Comments on: Relationships: What Keeps Them Going? http://www.jeffmccord.org/relationships-what-keeps-them-going/ Defining Moxie in a Digital Age Tue, 06 Jan 2009 13:45:54 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=abc hourly 1 By: Kataztrophy http://www.jeffmccord.org/relationships-what-keeps-them-going/comment-page-1/#comment-722 Kataztrophy Sat, 21 Jun 2008 19:45:26 +0000 http://www.jeffmccord.org/?p=251#comment-722 Realistic thinking is what keeps a relationship going. more people should realize there will be disagreements, and there will bbe hard times in all relationships. The devorse rate tells me that people are getting really naive. Realistic thinking is what keeps a relationship going. more people should realize there will be disagreements, and there will bbe hard times in all relationships. The devorse rate tells me that people are getting really naive.

]]> By: leasfoup http://www.jeffmccord.org/relationships-what-keeps-them-going/comment-page-1/#comment-719 leasfoup Sat, 21 Jun 2008 02:04:18 +0000 http://www.jeffmccord.org/?p=251#comment-719 My husband is hard-working and dedicated. I appreciate that I can count on him. But a simple act of kindness melts my heart. It's more important than anything else. My husband is hard-working and dedicated. I appreciate that I can count on him. But a simple act of kindness melts my heart. It’s more important than anything else.

]]> By: Callie Simms http://www.jeffmccord.org/relationships-what-keeps-them-going/comment-page-1/#comment-715 Callie Simms Fri, 20 Jun 2008 15:40:49 +0000 http://www.jeffmccord.org/?p=251#comment-715 Jeff - this was a great post and I really learned from the comments. I love what Travis said about "Understanding" and "Communication". I am most in the spot that you are in, very hard times and it's rocky. Last week, I came to the conclusion that I couldn't anymore. I have love my partner and we have spent many months talking about our needs and what we both want. I actually understand him after those long conversations, I don't think I was fully listening or choosing to listen to him, when he was saying "I can't be this and it's not fair to you." So from that, we decided to part ways, and I must say. And after all that, I think we both feel relief. And we have been working (business) together even better. I am only glad I did not loose a valuable friend. Jeff - this was a great post and I really learned from the comments. I love what Travis said about “Understanding” and “Communication”. I am most in the spot that you are in, very hard times and it’s rocky. Last week, I came to the conclusion that I couldn’t anymore. I have love my partner and we have spent many months talking about our needs and what we both want. I actually understand him after those long conversations, I don’t think I was fully listening or choosing to listen to him, when he was saying “I can’t be this and it’s not fair to you.” So from that, we decided to part ways, and I must say. And after all that, I think we both feel relief. And we have been working (business) together even better. I am only glad I did not loose a valuable friend.

]]> By: Ben Willis http://www.jeffmccord.org/relationships-what-keeps-them-going/comment-page-1/#comment-695 Ben Willis Wed, 18 Jun 2008 12:31:12 +0000 http://www.jeffmccord.org/?p=251#comment-695 Hey Jeff, I'm glad you took intense debate off your blog. Now I can comment from my iPod. I think it is very important for a couple to be completely honest with each other. If you hate something your partner does even I'd it I'd a small thing but you just can't get used to it no matter how hard you try. You need to tell your partner that it bothers you, I'd they really care about you they will stop. Ive learned this is very important in family relations in general. Thanks for the post! Hey Jeff, I’m glad you took intense debate off your blog. Now I can comment from my iPod.

I think it is very important for a couple to be completely honest with each other. If you hate something your partner does even I’d it I’d a small thing but you just can’t get used to it no matter how hard you try. You need to tell your partner that it bothers you, I’d they really care about you they will stop. Ive learned this is very important in family relations in general. Thanks for the post!

]]> By: Jess http://www.jeffmccord.org/relationships-what-keeps-them-going/comment-page-1/#comment-693 Jess Wed, 18 Jun 2008 05:34:13 +0000 http://www.jeffmccord.org/?p=251#comment-693 It's almost hard to say what makes my relationship work. I've been with my husband for almost 5 years, married for a year and a half, and I feel like we are incredibly lucky to have the relationship we do. It's all centered around trust for me--I was burned very, very badly before I met him, and when he finally came into my life, I knew from the moment I met him that he was as trustworthy as they come. I know that he is there for me whenever I need him, whether it's just taking out the trash, giving me a shoulder to cry on after a bad day, or taking care of me when I'm sick. That trust works both ways--there is nothing that I would not do for him if he asked it of me. Knowing that I have a partner in life who is always there to be at my side, comforting and supporting me, is so very powerful. Communication is also key--the only times we've ever fought (and I can count them on one hand) are when we don't adequately communicate with one another. It's so important to be honest and open with one another if something bothers you or you need something that you're not getting. It's also important to communicate the good things--the happy things, the things you love about each other. I don't ever leave the house or hang up the phone without telling him that I love him, and he does the same. I love hearing what a good cook I am, because it makes me feel like I can do something to help take good care of him. I always make sure he knows how much I appreciate him taking care of things when I'm not feeling well (which seems to be all the time lately). Those things may not seem like much, but our relationship is always the richer for them. It’s almost hard to say what makes my relationship work. I’ve been with my husband for almost 5 years, married for a year and a half, and I feel like we are incredibly lucky to have the relationship we do. It’s all centered around trust for me–I was burned very, very badly before I met him, and when he finally came into my life, I knew from the moment I met him that he was as trustworthy as they come. I know that he is there for me whenever I need him, whether it’s just taking out the trash, giving me a shoulder to cry on after a bad day, or taking care of me when I’m sick. That trust works both ways–there is nothing that I would not do for him if he asked it of me. Knowing that I have a partner in life who is always there to be at my side, comforting and supporting me, is so very powerful.

Communication is also key–the only times we’ve ever fought (and I can count them on one hand) are when we don’t adequately communicate with one another. It’s so important to be honest and open with one another if something bothers you or you need something that you’re not getting. It’s also important to communicate the good things–the happy things, the things you love about each other. I don’t ever leave the house or hang up the phone without telling him that I love him, and he does the same. I love hearing what a good cook I am, because it makes me feel like I can do something to help take good care of him. I always make sure he knows how much I appreciate him taking care of things when I’m not feeling well (which seems to be all the time lately). Those things may not seem like much, but our relationship is always the richer for them.

]]> By: Jeff McCord http://www.jeffmccord.org/relationships-what-keeps-them-going/comment-page-1/#comment-689 Jeff McCord Wed, 18 Jun 2008 03:17:09 +0000 http://www.jeffmccord.org/?p=251#comment-689 Keep them coming guys and gals - these are awesome! THANK YOU SO MUCH! Keep them coming guys and gals - these are awesome! THANK YOU SO MUCH!

]]> By: Neal Campbell http://www.jeffmccord.org/relationships-what-keeps-them-going/comment-page-1/#comment-684 Neal Campbell Wed, 18 Jun 2008 02:08:40 +0000 http://www.jeffmccord.org/?p=251#comment-684 More than anything to me, it's an initial decision that this thing will work and it will last eternally. Love is two things. It's a chemical reaction that can be triggered by holding hands and staring into each other's eyes. It's also a mental decision that I will commit my life to this person forever. The chemical part is groovy, but it's superficial. The decision is what really matters. It can bring the chemical gooey stuff back again and again and again. It also ends up causing Smurf sex. You can view that as a down side or an upside. It really just depends on how much you like the color blue. More than anything to me, it's an initial decision that this thing will work and it will last eternally. Love is two things. It's a chemical reaction that can be triggered by holding hands and staring into each other's eyes. It's also a mental decision that I will commit my life to this person forever. The chemical part is groovy, but it's superficial. The decision is what really matters. It can bring the chemical gooey stuff back again and again and again. It also ends up causing Smurf sex. You can view that as a down side or an upside. It really just depends on how much you like the color blue.

]]> By: travis http://www.jeffmccord.org/relationships-what-keeps-them-going/comment-page-1/#comment-683 travis Wed, 18 Jun 2008 01:21:13 +0000 http://www.jeffmccord.org/?p=251#comment-683 I agree with daysies and thus change my answer from "understanding" to second her "communication." First, to understand one another, you must communicate. I agree with daysies and thus change my answer from "understanding" to second her "communication." First, to understand one another, you must communicate.

]]> By: daysies http://www.jeffmccord.org/relationships-what-keeps-them-going/comment-page-1/#comment-682 daysies Wed, 18 Jun 2008 01:11:20 +0000 http://www.jeffmccord.org/?p=251#comment-682 the #1 thing is communication. i can not stress that enough. we've been married for almost 9 years, but have been together for over 14 years, and it was not always hugs & puppies. we've had our fair share of downs during our relationship prior to getting married, but we got through it all before we did get married. we've hit some rough patches during our marriage, too, but no where to the point of getting divorced. we don't believe in the D word. it was more like we weren't listening to each other. normally, when we hit those moments, before we blow up and say what we really don't mean to say, we take a break, go to our own rooms (our offices), do other things, blow off steam, and then come back together and talk in a much calmer tone. it works. seriously. when you're both angry and yelling and screaming because you've had a bad day at work, or you heard something the wrong way, no one is listening. so i can not stress that enough that the #1 thing to make a relationship work is communication. of course, there is love, understanding, compromise, and respect, too. but if you can't communicate to each other, you won't be able to get the rest. the #1 thing is communication. i can not stress that enough. we've been married for almost 9 years, but have been together for over 14 years, and it was not always hugs & puppies. we've had our fair share of downs during our relationship prior to getting married, but we got through it all before we did get married. we've hit some rough patches during our marriage, too, but no where to the point of getting divorced. we don't believe in the D word. it was more like we weren't listening to each other. normally, when we hit those moments, before we blow up and say what we really don't mean to say, we take a break, go to our own rooms (our offices), do other things, blow off steam, and then come back together and talk in a much calmer tone. it works. seriously. when you're both angry and yelling and screaming because you've had a bad day at work, or you heard something the wrong way, no one is listening. so i can not stress that enough that the #1 thing to make a relationship work is communication. of course, there is love, understanding, compromise, and respect, too. but if you can't communicate to each other, you won't be able to get the rest.

]]> By: Ross http://www.jeffmccord.org/relationships-what-keeps-them-going/comment-page-1/#comment-681 Ross Wed, 18 Jun 2008 01:03:31 +0000 http://www.jeffmccord.org/?p=251#comment-681 Probably the wrong person to give input on this. I don't let myself become dependent on people. Biggest thing on the relationship side of things is fear of being tied down. When I am hanging out with a girl and the "Hey, what do you think about starting a relationship?" question needs to be said, I start beating around the bush. Probably depriving myself of some good experiences. In regards to your question, the longest relationships I've had are ones that never got serious. Keepin' it casual, I've maintained friendships with lots of women for 7-10 years or more. Great people too. I wouldn't trade that for anything. Probably the wrong person to give input on this. I don't let myself become dependent on people. Biggest thing on the relationship side of things is fear of being tied down. When I am hanging out with a girl and the "Hey, what do you think about starting a relationship?" question needs to be said, I start beating around the bush. Probably depriving myself of some good experiences. In regards to your question, the longest relationships I've had are ones that never got serious. Keepin' it casual, I've maintained friendships with lots of women for 7-10 years or more. Great people too. I wouldn't trade that for anything.

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